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Joke of the Day

"[Wrench factory] BOSS: I'm proud to say it's been 250 days without an injury! WORKERS: *celebrate by tossing all the wrenches into the air *"

"The grass was greener on the other side, so we smoked it."

"Dr Seuss Jokes Hello M'lady, how are you today? Let's go to my place and then we may Play some cards and test our luck But after that let's go and fu...rnish my bedroom"

"I had a dream about a woman who becomes a horse at night. It was a nightmare."

"Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy? It was Valenswine's Day."

"It's pretty rude how they'll kick you out of the hospital just for using a defibrillator to make a grilled cheese sandwich."

"Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator"

"NASA's JUNO Probe finally reached Jupiter after ~5 year journey exactly halfway to its journey to Uranus."

"""How come we live in a world where lemonade is made from artificial flavors & furniture polish is made from real lemons?"""

"Interviewer: Can we call your former employer for a reference? Me: Not if you're considering me for the job."