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Joke of the Day
"I went on a date with a Vacuum Salesperson last night... It sucked."
Next Joke
"Porn is getting worse and worse by day (it's sick) even 5 yr olds are shaving their pussies."
"OUR KID WAS SOAKING WET WHEN YOU BROUGHT HIM HOME FROM SCHOOL! Me: [water pouring from backseat] Listen, this car pool thing was your idea"
"What did the rising sun say to the morning dew? You will be mist."
"What do you get when you cross a philosopher, an insomniac and a dyslexic? A guy who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog. ~ Infinite Jest, by DFW"
"Sometimes I just like to switch off I think that's why I lost my job in the Intensive Care Unit"
"The difference between a rooster and a lawyer? When the rooster wakes, his primal urge is to cluck defiance."
"I'm selling books on how to avoid saying the wrong thing and getting into fights. Who wants some?"
"Some of you may be dismayed by Ted Cruz's recent annoucements But please remember that ""pulling out"" is the only acceptable way for a Christian to terminate a presidency"
"I just got off the phone with my mother. She called 12 years ago."