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Joke of the Day

"#MarriedPeopleIssues You hang up.. No, you hang up... You hang up.... Noooo, you hang up. They're your clothes. I'm not your maid."

"Why are there no knock-knock jokes about America? Because freedom rings."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Because this joke was so bad, even Dane Cook wouldn't steal it."

"Had bacon this morning, made Monday joke, drinking coffee, will masturbate later. I AM TWITTER!"

"What did the brown dwarf say to the bartender? I'd like a Corona, please."

"What is the difference between a hormone and an enzyme? I didn't make an enzyme last night."

"A heads up.. So when searching for a place to eat at work and a coworker tells you about The Black Angus Campfire Feast and the boss is standing behind you. Check the spelling before hitting enter."

"Did you guys hear about the fire at the circus? It was in tents."

"I've never literally been tortured but I have walked behind old people when I was in a hurry."

"What's worse than finding out that your wife has cancer? Finding out it's curable."