214715

Joke of the Day

"Kermit and Miss Piggy are in bed and Miss Piggy says ""Kermit what are you going to do to my asshole tonight"" Kermit replied ""Rippit""."

"Sex is a big joke. I just don't get it."

"Do you have a nose? Who nose? Courtesy of the ~6yo on my morning bus."

"Medical fact If a woman drinks two glasses of wine a day, it increases the chance of a stroke. If you let her finish the bottle, she'll probably suck it as well! haw haw haw"

"What's green and empty? Orville's arsehole"

"364 days until Halloween and people already have their decorations up."

"They say drugs will hurt your long term memory but I kind of take pride in needing to Google the proper spelling of ""Bieber"" every damn time"

"Batman prank calls Spider-Man... Batman asks, ""Is uncle Ben home?"" Spider-Man says, ""No! He is at the theater with your parents!"""

"Never! And i mean never! say the word ""Bnag"" It's bang out of order."

"What did one egg cell say to the other? I'm not ovary fond of you"