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Joke of the Day

"I have Tourettes you fucking bitch."

"no title no text"

"If someone feeds you alphabet soup... Is that putting words in your mouth? Also, if they are about to feed you and pull back, is that taking the words out of your mouth?"

"two fish So there were two fish in a tank. The one fish looked at the other and said ""Hey buddy do you know how to drive this thing?"""

"what do men with erectile disfunction and nintendo cartridges have in common? It works if you blow it before you put it in."

"H: Gross! Stop peeing in the shower! Me: Why? Everybody pees in the shower. H: Yeah but you're not in it right now, I am."

"French Stoner Joke: 80"

"My wife and I were stuck in traffic. She said, ""I'm turning round."" ""I can see that,"" I replied. ""Try eating less chocolate."""

"I'm old school in the sense that I always put women and children first. I mean, there could be spiderwebs."

"Inspired by Baby Jesus, I'm hoping to get nailed this weekend."