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Joke of the Day

"Having a dog around pretty much denies any opportunity to take advantage of the 5 second rule on a dropped chip"

Next Joke
 
"Pro tip: when a cop asks you to step out of the car, don't reply with ""I'm too drunk, you get in."""
"What do you call it when you shit yourself during the first meal of the day? An Incontinent-al Breakfast"
"What's the difference between a thug and a phone charger? A phone charger charges batteries, but a thug has battery charges"
"So I shot an elephant in my pajamas.. How he got into my pajamas, I'll never know."
"What do you call a guy with diarrhea who just had his father committed to the insane asylum? A crap happy chappy with a slap happy pappy."
"I like my women like I like my wine.. 12 years old and locked up in a cellar."
"What would you call Jack Black and Jack White's kid? **A dirty abomination you god hating homosexual!**"
"What political party does Donald Trump belong to? The Whig Party"
"What's the difference between a cunt and an asshole? According to the latest polls, about 4%."
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