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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a thug and a phone charger? A phone charger charges batteries, but a thug has battery charges"

"Losing my virginity was a lot like my first football game Hurt, bloody, but at least my dad came."

"I'd tell you the joke about the philosopher but I think only a Nietzsche audience would understand it."

"Pros don't ever use the Tip."

"Why people cry during the weddings? ...they are preparing for whats coming afterwards"

"*calls restaurant* Me: Hi is your place a kid friendly restaurant? Host: Of course it is sir *hangs up*"

"Why did the angry Jedi cross the road? To get to the dark side."

"*puts on layers of running gear* *makes a ponytail* *laces up sneakers* *drives to McDonalds*"

"I like to go fishing from time to time... Just for the halibut."

"Which came first, the chicken, the egg, or the rooster's insistence that he knows what's best for both of their bodies?"