182967

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a thug and a phone charger? A phone charger charges batteries, but a thug has battery charges"

"In my bed, it's perpetual motion all night long, baby."

"Don't buy Colgate whitening toothpaste!! Label reads: Guaranteed whiteness in only 14 days... 15 days later and I'm still black."

"There are two things i hate a lot 1. Lists 2. Irony"

"I removed electrons from a seal Got a seal-ion"

"Gin & Tonic: 91 calories. Banana: 105 calories. Choosing the healthy option: Priceless."

"The guy that invented the heimlich maneuver died today... needless to say I'm a little choked up"

"I saw a sale ad for Extenze male enhancement pills... it was half off!"

"I wouldn't mind getting arrested today because I'm having a great hair day and my mug shot would be fabulous."

"What do you do for a living? I herd cattle. Ah, you're a rancher? No, I'm a Zumba instructor."