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Joke of the Day

"Saw two blind people fighting today. I said, ""I think that the guy with the knife will win!"" They both ran away. Edit: Grammar"

"Why is ship tapered Why is shit tapered? So you're asshole doesn't slam shut. (I was watching my dog take a dump yesterday and this old joke came to mind)"

"This blonde and her boyfriend were sitting in a hot tub when the blonde said to her boyfriend ""Is it true that if you pull your finger out I'll sink?"""

"What bird tastes just like butter ? A stork !"

"Why is there no windows 9? Obviously 789 I would be surprised if you said something else."

"A motorist was pulled over by a traffic cop. ""Excuse me, sir,"" said the cop. ""Do you realize your wife fell out of the car two miles back?"" ""Thank God,"" he said. ""I thought I'd gone deaf!"""

"Which came first? Chicken or the egg? I CAME FIRST! edit: CAME = CUM"

"Foreigner: I wanna know what love is.. Me: It's a feeling you get when.. Foreigner: I want you to show me.. Me: Ok, like wow. We just met"

"I've never been good when it comes to Greek mythology. It truly is my Achille's elbow."

"What's the opposite of Adele? Amac or BB-Mac (you pick which one's funnier)"