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Joke of the Day

"We've hired a new accountant. Her name is Helen Wait. Anyone expecting a check from us can go to Helen Wait."

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"Whats the difference between an anthropologist and a sociologist? Anthropologists hate Western Civilization. Sociologists only hate America."
"If there's something strange, in your neighborhood, Who ya gonna call? GEORGE ZIMMERMAN"
"In a last ditch effort to curb over grazing, some ranchers have decided to drive their cattle up into the mountains. Analysts say the steaks have never been higher."
"If u had Hitler & a guy who doesnt mute the keyboard on his iPhone in a room & could only kill one, would u give Hitler the dead guys phone?"
"did u hear about the crow that landed a job? he works in a caw center. he's winging it for now but it might take off"
"What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had ? The lion closed its mouth to see how many heads the slave had !"
"""You promise you didn't get me bees again"" [me from a distance] just open it"
"I found the city in which cheese was first produced! It's from Age!"
"I asked Barack Obama if we could get together later, and he said Yes We Can!"