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Joke of the Day

"(Ok don't let her know ur Jesus) Girl: Meet my dad *they shake hands* *Dad stands up from wheelchair* Dad: It's a miracle! Jesus: *facepalm*"

"Remember the Scooby Doo episode where they put Scooby down and gave Shaggy the death penalty for ripping the face off an innocent person?"

"I heard Oscar Pistorius had a hard time finding a lawyer for his murder trial... they kept saying he didn't have a leg to stand on."

"Sometimes I think... ...but usually I dont."

"What did the bishop say to the priest? It's my turn."

"I pledge allegiance to the Pizza and to the taste for which it stands, one Circle under sauce, with ranch and breadsticks for all"

"getting my hopes up only to become even more disappointed dot edu"

"I was checking into a hotel the other week....."

"Mind over matter they told me... Thanks for the gold stranger! *edit* Front page! Much wow!"

"Rumour has it that I got a new computer today... It's Adele!"