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Joke of the Day

"Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff... ... Buh dum pshh!"

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. That rose's name? Albert Einstein."

"It's impossible to rekindle an old flame... ... the restraining order and lifelong lighter ban saw to that."

"PET PEEVE: Why do we call them baby names? They're HUMAN NAMES. They don't expire as you grow up."

"*feels comfortable* comfortable: *slaps hand away*"

"What do you call an oversize motorcycle for pigs? A hog hog."

"Yar, I wound up a toy car and put it down me pants. It's driving me nuts."

"why did they invent white chocolate? so black kids can make a mess too..."

"I wonder if Taylor Swift ever gets one of her songs stuck in her head and also wants to kill herself"

"Starbucks coffee and Adam Hills. ""Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. You're going to get it, but its going to be rough."" Adam Hills"