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Joke of the Day

"White girls really love their Pumpkin Spice. Pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin spice candles, pumpkin spice president!"

"What do you get when you throw a Canadian down a flight of stairs? An apology."

"Why did the cop wake up his son? To stop a kid napping."

"I used to have an imaginary girlfriend but she left me for my best friend. Apparently he had a bigger imagination."

"I like my women like I like my whisky. 12 years old and mixed up with coke."

"Why do Asians have squinty eye balls? Because Atomic Bombs are pretty bright..."

"I want to do an essay on chronology and hand it in late... ... so the professor can say ""it's about time!"""

"How many introverts does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Why does it have to be a group activity?!"

"What do you call a Scotsman that's been strangled to death by his own clothing? Kilt."

"A skeleton walks into a bar... And askes for a beer and a mop."