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Joke of the Day

"Dropping the shampoo bottle in the shower is the most violent sound ever. ""U OK in there? Sounds like a Michael Bay film in that bathroom!"""

"What kind of dance does your mother do? The MOMbo."

"Telepathy ""Huh?"" Telepathy ""Ok...let's move on. What"" Telepathy ""Please stop interrupting! What are your strengths?"" *rolls eyes* Telepathy"

"North Korea new leader After Kim Jong Un dies, North Korea will be ruled by his son, Kim Jong Deux."

"A man that recently turned blind stabbed himself because he couldn't see the point anymore."

"Where does Vladimir keep his shit? In a Putin"

"5: let's play the quiet game. Me: Okay 5: ready..? Start. Me: 5: Me: 5: whoever talks first is the loser."

"An Irish, blind, gay, paraplegic blonde woman is wheeled into a bar.. ""Ow!"""

"I like my slaves like I like my coffee. Free."

"I got tasered by a female cop the other night.. never have I laid eyes upon a more stunning beauty."