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Joke of the Day

"I just had an AMAZING salad at McDonalds. The toppings I chose were 4 big macs & 10 chicken mc nuggets with 9 sweet & sour packs as dressing"

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"When my goldfish starts acting like a jerk I remind him that his bowl is microwave-safe"
"Why do church bells never send e-mails? They'd rather give each other a ring."
"Dad just dropped this at my cousin's 8th birthday party...I was the only one to burst out laughing.. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles."
"Why don't you hear any knock knock jokes about America? Because freedom rings."
"[GOP debate] JOHN KASICH: my dad was a mailman so i understand our nation's struggles MODERATOR: what how JK: i went through everyone's mail"
"CAT HOSPITAL Q: Why did the cat go to the hospital? A: To have a CAT scan done."
"My mother talks into the phone like a combat soldier calling in air support."
"Why do Santa and Mrs. Claus not have any children? ...because Santa comes but once a year"
"Why can't you make fun of Steve Jobs' death? ... Because it's not PC"