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Joke of the Day

"What do you call someone who spends all day masturbating in the restroom? Pissing away your future."

"How do most women like their eggs? Ovarie-z"

"Tiger, Lance and Tom walk into a cold bar... ""Heaters,"" the bartender cries in frustration, ""I told him to send me heaters!"""

"Have you ever noticed that in a pack of biscuits there are always broken ones? I don't know why they even bother putting them in."

"What's a crackhead with no drugs? Crack-a-lacking"

"What's the worst thing about a blackout? A shootout."

"What Disease Do You Get When You Have Sex With Harry Potter? Hogwarts."

"He held up my pants and said ""Are you sure these are yours? They look small. You can fit in these??"" Judge: Not guilty. You're free to go."

"shave your dog in the winter so he stands out in the crowd. if you lose him u can easily describe him as the cold bald dog"

"It has been said that 25% of people have a distrust of stairs Because they are always up to something"