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Joke of the Day

"""Y'know, I've realize something. In almost every Western cartoon there is talking animals in it."" ""Hmm, I can't really think of any."" The pig replied."

"2 pedophiles are chilling on the beach, one says to the other... Hey can you get out of my son"

"What does a tornado and a black person have in common? It only takes one to ruin a good neighbourhood!"

"Hi I'm an evil ghost with the ability to defy time & space, but I think the best example of my powers will be to slightly close this door."

"What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground. Except for the eagle."

"By now, I've stopped calling it ""sandwich"" meat and started calling it ""stand in front of the fridge and eat it out of the baggie"" meat."

"My questionnaire for dogs: 1. Do you like to get pet 2. Who is a good boy 3. Is it you"

"How does King Arthur take his pills? An African or European swallow"

"WIFE: how old is your daughter? WIFE'S FRIEND: she's eight going on nine. ME: *whispering* That's how numbers work"

"Don't try to tell me that hungry is not an emotion because I feel that in my soul."