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Joke of the Day

"I miss the 80s, when you could hide an alien in your room for 3 days before mom found out and five kids on bikes could outsmart the police."

"What do a pizza boy and a gyneocologist have in common? They both smell it but can't eat it."

"What's Fonzie's favorite indefinite article? Ehhhhhh!"

"I fake the art of fainting so well my favorite restaurant now refers to me as ""Low Blood Sugar Girl"" while rushing my limp body to a table."

"My friend Dave drowned yesterday his funeral is on Wednesday. I've made him a wreath in the shape of a buoyancy aid. It's what he would have wanted."

"Customer: Waiter this food is repeating on me. Waiter: Good we love repeat business."

"Do you smoke? Smokers: ""Yes."" Non-Smokers: ""Never have, never will."" Stoners: ""Smoke what?"""

"Knock Knock - Who's there? Joana. Joana who? I Joana close my eyes, I Joana fall asleep 'cause i miss you babe and i don't wanna miss a thing."

"A QA tester walks into a bar... and orders 1 beers and orders 5 beers and orders 9999 beers and orders -1 beers and orders foobar beers"

"What do the Welsh call safe sex? Spray painting the sheep that bite."