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Joke of the Day

"Why does Edward Woodward have so many Ds in his name? Because if he didn't, he'd be called Ewar Woowar."

"Why are blood bank workers so good at correcting spelling mistakes? Because they see typos every day."

"Someone turn off the internet I'm trying to sleep"

"give us a pickup line related to your profession WITHOUT revealing your profession. we'll try to guess I might have posted in the wrong sub Reddit. let me know if we should move it!"

"The reason cats are so pissy is they're God's perfect killing machines but they only weigh 8lbs and we keep picking them up and kissing them"

"What do you call someone who talks on their phone during dinner? Cellfcentered"

"Why do cows have hooves? Because they lac tose"

"what the hell does my dog have to sigh about"

"A sadist met a masochist... and said ""hurt me"" ""No"" said the sadist."

"What is this compound? Chemistry teacher drew this during class. http://imgur.com/fQyNg Don't know how to type spoilers, but maybe rot13 will do. Vg'f n cnenqbk."