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Joke of the Day

"Some say I've ""gone off the rails,"" or ""left the reservation,"" or ""screwed the pooch,"" or ""mixed my metaphors,"" or ""launched the hot dog"""

"Once again, I've forgotten what time class starts... When will I ever learn?"

"Did I tell you guys about my awesome camping trip? Yea, it was in tents"

"Why is Uhura black? Because William shat on her."

"I sexually identify as a brick. I'm always hard and I've only been laid once."

"the restraining order doesn't mean we can't hang, it just means I can't be within 50'. We could still play catch or frisbee or something..."

"Why did the priest go to the gym? For muscle mass. I thought of this one in the shower this morning."

"When life hands you melons... you're dyslexic."

"What function puts you in the danger zone The LOG^^^gins function!"

"Did you hear about that synthetic type of weed they made using dog hair? Instead of k2, they call it k9."