209909

Joke of the Day

"Tell someone, ""You wore that shirt the day after yesterday"" and see how long it takes them to get it."

"One of my great-grandparents believed in God, but the other seven didn't Which makes me an eighth theist"

"I want a pet otter just so I can introduce it as my otter half."

"A person is drowning and yelling ""HELP I DON'T KNOW HOW TO SWIM"" A bystander tells him to shut up because he doesn't know how to swim either but he's not freaking out about it like the guy drowning."

"It's like Batman didn't even care about crime in the cities surrounding Gotham."

"Homeless people's dogs must think, ""Damn, this is the longest walk ever!"""

"An Englishman and a chineseman are arguing, However... The English man is constantly confused why the Chinese man insists hes wrong, and that the English man is right."

"THEM: You can't go wrong with this recipe. ME: Watch me."

"A blind man walks into a bar ow."

"Why is a pizza delivery guy like a gynecologist? They're allowed to smell it, but they get in trouble if they eat it. Teehee"