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Joke of the Day
"Thank God I'm an Athiest After seeing what happened in Paris! Religious people scare me!"
Next Joke
"Q: How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Ve are asking ze qvestions here! A: Two one to give the order that the bulb be changed and one to screw it in."
"Joke my dad loved What's the last thing each tickle-me-elmo doll gets before leaving the factory? Two test tickles"
"I screwed one of my fans. Safe to say it blew me all night."
"You know you're a Star Trek fan when you... hate Voyager and you've only seen every episode one time."
"Why is ISIS like Little Miss Muffet? They both have Kurds in their way."
"I beat my girlfriend at dominos the other night. She needs to learn that *I* choose the pizza toppings."
"What do Auschwitz, Treblinka, and Sobibor have in common? Tons of koffing spawns."
"Thankful that Five-Fingered Shoes company doesn't make pants."
"how do I keep my skin looking so young? it's all thanks to [turns to camera smiling] an ancient curse [locusts pour from my mouth & eyes]"