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Joke of the Day

"Wasn't wearing my glasses at the park and bent down to pet some guy's gym bag. How's your night going?!"

"Where does a Sith Lord do their shopping? The Maul."

"It's illegal to tie your children to things but you can basically do the same by buying them a phone with a short charger and a bad battery."

"I'm growing my prostate to raise awareness for moustache cancer."

"Republicans and elections The republicans wanted to have Jesus run for president. The plan had to be aborted though: he had a hole in his hand."

"What do you call someone who only speaks one language? American."

"What's white on top and black on the bottom? A: Society."

"Help me Obi Wan Kenobi. You're my only Never mind. Batman's here."

"Have you heard about the blind hooker? You've gotta hand it to her"

"People think I'm weird because I swallowed an abacus They're forgetting it's what's on the inside that counts."