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Joke of the Day

"What did the Zucchini say when it got stepped on? *squash*"

"What did the scientist say when he stubbed his toe? Flourine Uranium Carbon Potassium."

"Desperate, I pull a goose from my bag and throw it screaming into the bully's face. Gertrude, my biggest and angriest goose, destroys him."

"Why is America trying to bomb the lady who lives in my iPhone she seems nice"

"Why can't a bike stand on its own? Because it is two tired."

"Why are African Americans called Negroes? Because their dicks grow to their knees. Negro=knee grow"

"My car has a GPS, but when I get lost I still usually just end up busting out a globe"

"On the Mexican side of the US-Mexico border, there are guards. On the US side, there are trampolines."

"A Valentines Poem Roses are red Violets are blue Whitney Houston is dead and iiiiiiieeeeiiiii will always love yoooouooooou"

"2 snails There were 2 snails on the back of a turtle. One of the snails turned to the other and said ""hold on."""