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Joke of the Day
"I like my beer like i like my violence... Domestic."
Next Joke
"You know why the swimming events are so popular at the 2016 Olympics?.... Because Brazilians rarely get too see clean water"
"They say ""dress for the job you want,"" but this space suit chafes and I'm not convinced that Arby's is truly committed to a space program."
"If you asked everyone in the world whether they preferred bunnies or rats The results would be a little lop-sided."
"What has 40 teeth and holds a monster at bay? My zipper."
"Why is there no Mexican olympics? because all the ones who can run, jump and swim have already crossed the border"
"Dude: You got a light? Me: Sure. *hand him a flashlight* Dude: I mean for my cigarette. Me: Yeah, he can use it."
"The best jokes are the ones you have to explain. It's funny because the best jokes are the ones you *don't* have to explain."
"Me: My father's name is LAUGHING and my Mother's name is SMILING. Teacher: You must be Kidding? Me: No, that's my brother. I'm JOKING."
"Even the stick figure woman on my wife's back window has a headache."