2077

Joke of the Day

"Phone on silent. 10 missed calls. Turns volume to loudest. Nobody calls All damn Day."

"My father always said to me ""son it's always best to fight fire with fire""... and that is probably why he was kicked out of the fire service"

"Sexxist much? Q: how do you turn a dishwasher into a snow plow? A: give her a shovel."

"Why did the teacher decide to become an electrician? To get a bit of light relief."

"How do you change a cat into a dog? Soak it in gasoline, hold a match up to it, and ""woof!"""

"Have you ever tried eating a clock? It is very time consuming"

"Just sent my boss an email that said ""Keep me coming"" instead of ""Keep 'em coming."" So, that's fun."

"How do you torture Hellen Keller? Give her a basketball and tell her to read it."

"Which snakes are found on cars? Windscreen vipers."

"Revere rides a horse saying ""The British are Coming""and it's heroic but I hop a pogo stick naked screaming ""look at me""and it's probation?"