2077

Joke of the Day

"Phone on silent. 10 missed calls. Turns volume to loudest. Nobody calls All damn Day."

"[Asking someone out] Um...so do you want to come to my exorcism next week?"

"My girlfriend calls me Duracell Because I last up to 10 times longer"

"What does the snowman call his wife? Snowblower"

"What do you call a cross between a human and a monkey? A nigger."

"The Notebook (2004) A stranger harasses a nursing home resident with stories about people she doesn't know (PG-13 2hr 3min)"

"""I'm a huge fan."" - Peacocks"

"Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity."

"I went to my first Fight Club meeting last night Unfortunately I arrived 10 minutes late so I missed the introductions but I must say I had a fantastic time I'd recommend it to everyone."

"My wife and I have had sex six times in the last three months. I wonder what's making her so horny."