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Joke of the Day

"Revere rides a horse saying ""The British are Coming""and it's heroic but I hop a pogo stick naked screaming ""look at me""and it's probation?"

"Tech Support: ""Which format are the images you send?"" Customer: ""Rectangular 15x11 centimeters."""

"I wish scientists could make us as indestructible as cartoons. I've got a list of people I'd like to drop an anvil on."

"i always get gatorade and gasoline confused. my car is real good at sports and im dead"

"What do you call a group of poor homeless people that show up to a party? Party paupers"

"Yo mama so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk."

"How did the mathematician solve his constipation problems? The same way he solved all other problems: He worked it out with a pencil and paper."

"Whats a pirates favourite kind of wood?? Seeder"

"My grandma has been lying to me for years. A watched pot really does boil. Moral of the story, trust no one."

"Honey, what is the name of that German that hides things around the house? Alzheimer grandma, Alzheimer!"