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Joke of the Day

"How do you change a cat into a dog? Soak it in gasoline, hold a match up to it, and ""woof!"""

"Why Can't I Find Out Anything About This Superb Owl #superbowl"

"What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scotsman? Mick Jagger says ""Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!"", but the Scotsman says ""Hey! McCloud! Get off of my ewe!"""

"Why do vultures hate flying? Because they have to pay extra for Carrion! Budum tsssss"

"What's the difference between GTA V Online and a non-essential government employee? Nothing neither one has been working since Tuesday..."

"Procrastination Paradox... If you come in last in a procrastination contest because you procrastinated, does that make you the best or worst at procrastinating...???"

"BILLY CORGAN: the world is a vampire ME: wouldn't it explode into flames as soon as the sun hit it then? BILLY: shut up *runs off crying*"

"What's darker than 3am in the morning? 12' noon in the cotton fields."

"This goes with this goes with this goes with this goes with this goes with this goes with ... It`s two lepers getting themselves back together after some aggressive sex."

"What does Ellen Pao have in common with the girl's mom from 'The Sixth Sense'? The both have no idea why everyone stopped talking and just stared at her."