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Joke of the Day

"""It's not about the size of the boat it's the motion of the ocean""... But it's hard to get cross the Atlantic with a rowboat"

"Did you know that Helen Keller lived in a huge mansion? Neither did she"

"Most of my life consists of trying to keep up with what's not cool so I can be sure to avoid any small talk."

"There are 10 types of people in this world, those that understand hexadecimal, F the rest."

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ""Oh sure, just because I'm a woman means I have to do everything around here. And let me tell you..."""

"I was in the supermarket when I got a message on my phone telling me there were 24 singles in my area, Think I'm going to delete the Kraft Cheese app."

"Things I'm doing today * going to the gym * having sex * lying"

"Why do people with OCD like Family Feud? Because it's always black and white."

"what would Arnold Schwarzenegger say if he was a member of Al Qaeda? GET TO THE VIRGINS"

"Shout out to accordion files, conveniently storin' documents and expandin' as more are added and whatnot."