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Joke of the Day

"The world is so full of double standards... A woman tris to sleep with every guy she sees and she's a slut. I try to do that and all of the sudden I'm 'gay' and not allowed in Toys 'R' Us anymore."

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's a pretty obscure number, you've probably never heard of it..."

"What do you call a dead magician? Abra Cadaver."

"What do you call a police woman who shaves? Cunt Stubble."

"To Find and Replace the new /r/news sidebar terminology Find ""Rule"" Replace with ""Shari'a Law"""

"What's the difference between a fedora clad Brony and an egg? The egg gets laid!"

"What do you call... A cow with one leg? Lean beef What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Your mom"

"How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? ... you pick him up and suck his dick."

"The 4th little pig built his house into a windmill. The wolf huffed and puffed and generated enough power to last the whole winter."

"Poor Luigi when his parents were all, ""This is Mario, we also call him 'Super Mario'. And this Luigi, we also call him 'Player 2'."