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Joke of the Day

"Would I be in a porno for a million dollars? It depends. What kind of porn? Will my mom see it? Do I have to pay the million all at once?"

"[hospital] SON: I came as soon as I heard. What happened? DAD: The oying hit me SON: What's an oying? DAD: You are, kiddo *dies*"

"Doctor and patient Doctor: ""I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live."" Patient: ""What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"" Doctor: ""Nine."""

"I recently joined a nudist colony.. The first week was the hardest"

"The lady in front of me wearing yoga pants keeps bending over to pick up quarters, hope she will for dimes too, as I'm out of quarters."

"Always wanted to call people who don't like astronomy ""Galactos Intolerant"""

"Everyone asks me if I'm in a relationship with the blind girl that I recently met... But I'm just seeing her."

"What do you call a gang of penguins? A ganguin"

"*goes to the park* *spoon feeds red bull to the ducks*"

"What's a pirate's least favorite letter? Dear Sir, We are writing to you because you have violated copyright ..."