206217

Joke of the Day

"The minute I even contemplate wearing a white shirt, 11 jars of salsa fall from the sky and spill on it and then it catches on fire"

"What is it called when the Queen farts? a noble gas!"

"In Episode III, why did Obi Wan not finish Anakin off after their duel? Because Anakin was unarmed."

"Young people of today will never know the joy of having a cassette stuck in the car stereo & listening to the same 12 songs for 20 years."

"ME: I fell off a 50 ft tall ladder once GIRL: holy cow how did you survive ME: I fell off the bottom rung"

"[Job interview] Interviewer: Do you have any questions? Me: Who closes the door when the bus driver gets off the bus? Interviewer: Holy shit"

"What does Garfield like in his bed? Pussy"

"Itching, flaky skin? Burning sensation while urinating? You're probably on fire!"

"Who played Gandalf in the Islamic version of Lord of the Rings? Syrian Mckellen"

"Why was the burrito embarrassed? It saw the salad dressing."