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Joke of the Day

"What did Stevie Wonder's younger brother think their parents named him after British royalty? Because they named him Stevie Twoder."

"Did you watch the movie constipation? It never came out."

"What's a rabbits' favorite musical? Hare."

"I met Michael J Fox yesterday... I was going to shake his hand but remembered it does that on its own."

"I have an EpiPen I'll use it as a weapon to fend off the repost haters."

"Dogs and house intruders What did 15 of my former dogs and the intruder have in common? They were delicious."

"I saw her biting her bottom lip so I threw her a cupcake. Poor girl must have been starving."

"Operator: 999, emergency services. Which service do you require? Me: Oh! Don't mind me, I was just cleaning cake off the touch screen."

"What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute? The prostitute will stop screwing you when you die."

"I worked as a programmer for autocorrect but the fried me for no raisin #PunYourJob"