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Joke of the Day
"I stayed up all night to find out where the sun went... Then, it dawned on me."
Next Joke
"do mice turn into rats or do i just have both in my apartment?"
"I bought my son a trampoline But all he wanted to do was sit and cry in his wheelchair - This was a repost but I thought it was too funny not to share"
"I'm selling books on how to avoid saying the wrong thing and getting into fights. Who wants some?"
"Why should you never bet on Germany at the Olympics? They have the worst track record for finishing a race."
"Europe is in turmoil, but at least I've got some steady income despite the migrant crisis I own a florist around the corner from the French embassy"
"My cats always look at me like I should have planned something for us to do."
"Amy Schumer's track record for great comedy is at an all time career high right now. Hope it doesn't end in a **Trainwreck**"
"What are the Rolling Stones better at than the Bee gees? Stayin' Alive"
"What's the difference between God and Donald Trump? God doesn't think he's Donald Trump"