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Joke of the Day

"I saw a bald eagle carry away a bunny rabbit today, and I was like, ""well, at least somebody gets to be held."""

"Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear ? Because he liked sole music !"

"What do you call a parrot when it has dried itself after a bath? Polly unsaturated!"

"Bob's volunteered to give a C programming workshop but needs a topic Give that man some pointers"

"Enthusiasm 365 days until Christmas and people already have their trees up."

"me: [first gang practice] is snack time before or after the murders"

"What does the ninja call his penis? meningococcal"

"If there's one thing my English major girlfriend has taught me, It's what a colon does."

"Going commando is the closest I'll ever get to joining the army."

"A cicada crawled up my butt while I was sleeping last night. I'm not worried though. It'll come out in 13 years."