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Joke of the Day

"Why did the hipster burn his tongue when he drank his coffee? ....Because he drank it before it was cool."

"As an artist, I'm not comfortable drawing people's butts. You gotta draw the line somewhere.."

"donald trump's immigration policy If he doesn't use #Mexit when describing his immigration policy it will be a missed opportunity."

"Is one of the steps in the P90X workout to tell everyone on Facebook that you're doing it?"

"Before I eat chips, I have to look in the bag for a perfect one"

"Me: I'm having a problem with my computer: IT guy: Have you tried punching it? Me: That's the first thing I tried. I'm not an idiot."

"What do you call a cow with three legs? Lean beef."

"A good way to make a car dealer uncomfortable is to say, ""Tell me if you can hear this,"" and then get in the trunk and start screaming."

"I don't understand hair It's just over my head."

"Thinking is bad... thinking is bad... it ruins every 3 out of 2 relationships"