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Joke of the Day
"A man was writing a book with over 1,000 pages. It's too long of a story to explain why."
Next Joke
"My family is German. I've learned the hard way not to get drunk. The hangovers aren't the problem, but for some reason I keep waking up in Poland, and all my Jewish neighbors keep vanishing..."
"Please don't put out your cigarettes in the urinal... they are so damn hard to light up again."
"When I think of all the money I've spent on booze in my life, I wish I had it all back. Imagine all the booze I could buy!"
"A lady asked me where my adopted son came from and I said if she doesn't know by now where babies come from it's not my place to tell her"
"""Hey, let's get the guys that built the Obamacare website to update our app!"" - Twitter"
"Woke up to find a cruise ship parked right outside my hotel window. well if you think this is going to make me put on clothes you're wrong."
"I hate every child in a commercial."
"beluga whale backstroke and blowing water http://youtu.be/M6f1vovJTP4"
"What do you call a Hindu lizard? A karma chameleon"