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Joke of the Day

"I don't understand women... I thought opening the door was the right thing to do, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane..."

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"How long do you need to put the turkey in the oven for? Mine was dead within 30 minutes (credit goes to my Grandma)"
"I'm Not Racist I'm not racist, my slave is a black guy."
"What's invisible and fucks kids? The Zika virus."
"Who's killed more natives than General Custer? Jack Daniels"
"A 15 year old took gold in the Olympics and then there is me whose greatest accomplishment is getting up to 10 on flappy bird."
"What is it called when you kill a chickpea? Hummuside"
"Life starts with everyone cheering when you poop and goes drastically down hill from there."
"If only the Olympics had an event that involved falling down and not spilling your drink..."
"A man with pica walks into a bar... ...and orders a drink on rocks. Hahahaha! Smart people jokes are the best!"