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Joke of the Day
"[at a wedding] ""So, ya come here often?"""
Next Joke
"When are they going to pass a law making the selling of horrible guacamole punishable with death?"
"A tornado is about 5 minutes away and our satellite is out. I hope our house lands somewhere where the cable works!"
"Don't open this unless you want to know what turns on a necrophiliac Deadass"
"A man carrying a tombstone walked up to a skeleton taking a break from his casket. He asked the skeleton, ""Is it okay if I leave this tombstone here?"" The skeleton replied, ""Yes, over my dead body."""
"What starts with 'D' and has two letters in it? w"
"If a flea and a fly pass each other what time is it? Fly past flea."
"I joined snapchat yesterday; apparently my phone doesn't die fast enough for my liking."
"PUTIN: If your American lover is in this room I'll kill him ELENA: He's not! PUTIN: (softly) u...s... [bursting from closet] A! USA! USA!"
"What word starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck"