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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I'm behind a college girl in starbucks she has to order a triple mocha dark chocolate raspberry ugg boot white iphone 5 spice latte"

"BAE: come over ME: we live together im sitting right here BAE: my parents arent home ME: what is wrong with you"

"Well ladies valentines day is over. Time for the men to go back to being a-holes again."

"What's the difference between a Ferrari and a box of dead babies ? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage."

"How many Freudian slips does it take to change a light bulb? Two! One to hold the bulb, the other to hold the cock, uh, penis, I mean, uh, ladder."

"Be careful when you're watching a movie with your wife. You're gonna get blamed for whatever the guy in the movie does."

"FREE HOROSCOPE: You look terrible today. Avoid stuff and people. Don't buy a Kindle. Also, brush your teeth more often."

"What do you call a Chinese rapist? Peking Dick"

"I once took out the trash for four straight months Then we broke up."

"What do chemists make guacamole out of? Avogadros"