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Joke of the Day

"Made a friend today. Well, I knocked on my window when a guy walked past my house. I'll name him Terry."

"What do you call a singing bottle of mustard? Celine Dijon"

"How does a woman destroy a mans pride with 4 words? Is it in yet? How does a man destroy a womans pride with 4 words? I don't know."

"10: What does AF mean? After Flossing. Now go brush your teeth and they will be clean AF. Why do you ask? 10: Mom said you were lazy AF."

"What's the difference between a cow and 9/11? In the US you can't milk a cow for 14 years."

"Peter Pan is my favorite story about how running away from all your problems will allow you to remain youthful and to possibly fly someday"

"What's the meaning of life? Why don't you google it?"

"Why did the cookie visit the doctor? He was feeling a little crummy."

"Does a basketball player with an extra chromosome... have both ups and downs?"

"Got a text from my girlfriend, thespacebuttonisfaultyonthisphonecanyoupleasegivemeanalternative.' I wonder what ternative' means?"