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Joke of the Day

"I'm not really that surprised that there was a controversy over that Tracer pose in Overwatch. After all, she *is* an offensive hero."

"2Pac died because he lived the thug life. This 6 pack is going to die because I live the chug life."

"Why did the boy stare at his orange juice for so long? Because it said, Concentrate."

"You know what i hate the most about Sex Ed? that he's been convicted of several cases of sexual assault"

"I can't believe it. I saw on the news where a midget got pick pocketed in broad daylight...how could anyone stoop so low?"

"People keep comparing the election to Empire Strikes Back or Revenge Of The Sith... Personally I would have gone with The Star Wars Christmas Special"

"Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes... That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away and you'll have his shoes."

"A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building... He yells ""Don't do it! You have so much potential!"""

"I wanted some Lipo D energy drink, so I asked Gary Johnson if knew where I could find some. He asked me back... What's a lipo?"

"What was tina turners pet name for Ike? Beats me"