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Joke of the Day

"Field testing has shown that coworkers are most likely to enter my office 8-11 seconds after I fart."

"What do bostonians call dogs that protect heaven's gates? God dogs"

"Hey Guys, I don't have Instagram but I just wanted to let you know that I had oatmeal for breakfast. No sugar, mixed with water."

"I went to a peanut factory last week. It was nuts!"

"A wife asks her husband, ""Does this dress make me look fat?"" Her husband responds, ""No, that question makes you look stupid""."

"Whats the point of calling it ""secret Santa""? Everyone knows that the person who gave you the gift is Santa."

"Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you. But roses are wilting, violets are dead, sugar bowl's empty and so is your head."

"What's in a domestic book? Home page."

"Growing up, my parents nicknamed by penis 'Eamonn' I never managed to get all my pee in the bowl."

"Receiving reddit gold was like losing my virginity. I knew it would never happen again."