201918

Joke of the Day

"What's it called when you're anxious enough to be a Helicopter Mom, but really, really lazy? A Blimp Mom? Yeah, I'm that."

"I read the new iPhone was a commercial failure. This surprised me, because I thought it was going to be a 6S."

"I wait tables with an obnoxious ex-mechanical engineer... ...he's always going on and on about the restaurant's utensil modulus."

"How much hummus did the anorexic girl order? A tahini bit."

"How did LaKeisha's Mom finally stop her from bouncing on the trampoline in the rec room? She put a piece of velcro on the ceiling."

"How does the Asian chef get to work? He woks."

"What do dead kids and jokes about dead kids have in common? They never get old."

"What did batman say to the joker when he finally caught him? Gotham"

"Why did adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side"

"What did the horse say to Santa? Nothing, horses can not speak."