201620

Joke of the Day

"My wife was raped by a gang of mimes. They found many ways to get in and out of the box. OR They did unspeakable thing to her."

"What is the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair!"

"When I was a kid, my grandfather told me his teeth are like the stars... ...they come out at night."

"Why does Mexico never do well in the Olympics? Anyone who can run, jump or swim is already over the border"

"ATTRACTIVE WOMAN: What time is it? ME: Haha. Yeah definitely"

"Got a case for my iPhone even though the screen is already cracked. So basically it's like putting a condom on my kid's head."

"[Office] *Dolphin accidentally dials fax number Fax:EEphkEekakischchEEek Dolphin:Well, I don't normally do this. But yes I'm free tonight"

"You always split up amicably if you date a mathematician. Because they always break up with respect to ex."

"Did you know that, during the first game of the 1936 baseball season, the Boston Braves managed to win while also badly injuring six players on the opposing team? They were truly ruthless."

"I slept like a baby last night... I woke up every 15 minutes and then shat myself"