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Joke of the Day

"Trump should have called his rally in Chicago a ""job fair"" non of the protesters would've been there"

"Maybe don't show me a picture if you don't want me to rate your baby."

"are you the girl who has to type everything said in court? ""yes"" I'm sorry *looks back at prosecutor and answers his question as a dolphin*"

"Wanna hear a joke The UN"

"What's the opposite of Christopher Walken? Christopher Reeves"

"I prefer shampoo to the real thing."

"Archeologist: someone whose carreer lies in ruins."

"*reads own tweet* Haha, so relatable"

"Sorry I can't date you because I'm seeing anybody else."

"I know a guy named Bill who stuck his dick in penut butter. He was fucking nuts."