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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a nice Canadian meal on a colorful roof? Poutina."

"What do you call promoting a broom to the highest rank in the military? A Sweeping Generalization."

"I believe all people are equal... ...whether they're black, Chinese or normal."

"What's warm, white, and I drink almost every night? Warm milk before bed... Get your mind out of the gutter!"

"What's pink, bubbly and scratches at glass? A baby in a microwave"

"I changed my iPhone's name to Titanic. It's syncing now."

"Accidentally fell asleep smoking an e-cigarette and when I woke up my whole house was on the internet."

"""ARGHH A HOUSE SPIDER"" [spider removes earbuds] ""yah actually im more into ambient trance but whatever"""

"Whats the difference between jam and jelly? I can't jelly my cock down your throat."

"finally got to see someone in my facebook feed react to an onion article as if it were real news. today was a big day."