2013

Joke of the Day

"I've just been refused entry to the National Alzheimer's conference. ""Do you know who I am?"" I shouted."

"Shout out to old guy behind counter who started coughing really hard, drank some water, recovered, chuckled, and said ""Not today!"""

"TIFU by accidentally eating my friend's sandwich from Subway Oops, wrong sub."

"My family branded me as a failure, then I invented an invisibility cloak. If only they could see me now..."

"What's a gay-bar pickup line? Can I push your stool in?"

"Adulthood is the moment you switch from taking the occasional drug to trip out, to taking the occasional drug to feel normal."

"Chuck Norris can recharge his chuckPod by plugging it into a piece of cheese."

"I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control... I thought to myself Well, this changes everything"

"Did you know the first sniper was a Mexican? Juan shot, Juan kill."

"A guy walks into the psychiatrists office where I work wearing nothing but Saran Wrap undies... The psychiatrist said, ""I can clearly see you're nuts!"""