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Joke of the Day

"If you tell me to ""chillax,"" I will ""chillstab"" you and ""chillaugh"" while you bleed to ""chilldeath."""

"I've realised my works is like a gang rape... a bunch of dicks clustered around the cunt that's got no idea of what's gonna happen!"

"What do all Yale and Harvard students have in common? They got into Yale."

"Friends are like balloons; if you stab them, they die."

"Fidel Castro was a cigar-smoking, repressive leader who hated free speech and a free press. Donald Trump, in comparison, doesn't smoke."

"My wife's sister My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I should have taken them off."

"Confucius say Woman with big balloons has high rise accommodation."

"What do you call a group of goose haunting you? A poltergeest"

"Our father who art in heaven what does that mean like painting or something"

"What's brown and screams? Stevie Wonder answering the iron"