200741

Joke of the Day

"I don't always go golfing, but when I do I bring two pairs of pants... ....in case I get a hole in one"

"You found poison in his stomach? But he HATED poison!"

"Knock knock, interrupting cat (warning, do NOT tell joke in busy public areas) Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting cat Interrupting ca... MMEEAAOOWW"

"On average, a person has sex 86 times a year. Apparently, this is going to be one hell of a week."

"Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Their kids haven't ."

"Why does Dr Pepper come in a bottle? Because his wife is dead."

"A bad cheese joke. How did I boast to the cheese I made myself? ""Gruyere."""

"What is a Honeymoon salad? Lettuce alone."

"What do you call a cow that gets hit by a car? A dead cow! (My 5-year old made up this joke)"

"Me: goodnight kids Kids: goodnight dad Me: goodnight monster that eats children who are bad Wife: [through radio under the bed] GOODNIGHT"