200197

Joke of the Day

"When your kids are little you're a superhero. When they're teens you're a super villain. After that, your only power is invisibility."

"Want to hear a dirty joke? A white horse fell into mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Three men taking a shower together."

"Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold."

"What is an out of date joke you still remember? One from the 90's: What do you call a little burro? A Burrito. What do you call a little taco? A Taquito What do you call a little judge? A Judge Ito"

"Help your friends diet by replacing the light in their fridge with an air horn."

"DILN IS A BADDY HAHAHAHA"

"Coworker: people around the office think you're too controlling Me: what's that? Coworker: oh, sorry *raises hand*"

"I am black and my son stole my wallet. I don't know If I'm proud or mad."

"They tried to make me go to rehab, and I said ""My HMO doesn't cover residential treatment."""

"Here's a tip for when you're feeling shit. Wear gloves"